However, this separation period can be complicated because while you’re deciding one thing – your spouse from whom you’re separated may be deciding the same thing as you – or something completely different. Some result in life-long venom, but others result in happy separations and blended families that all get along. In states like California, you cannot get divorced until six months after the date of a legal separation. And this vindictiveness can show up in punitive financial settlements or custody settlements that are not in anyone's best interest, but make the aggressor feel like he or she is punishing the other ex for dating by taking custody or money away.While you’re dating and realizing you want your husband and marriage back again, he may see you dating, become enraged that you’ve moved on so easily, and start planning a bitter divorce battle in which he plans to leave you nothing, financially, as punishment for hurting his feelings by moving on so easily. But regardless, here are some things to consider when dating between your separation and your divorce: Just because you are not living together and have threatened each other with divorce does not mean you are divorced or even legally separated. The reason that these dates are important is because there is not usually a legal financial or custody settlement until a divorce is finalized -- and even after a divorce is finalized there can still be an outstanding financial or custody settlement. Overall, keeping your dating during a divorce process on the down low is prudent for best results.Once you are legally separated, you are NOT divorced.Dating during separation is not always a bad idea because it can help you decide whether divorce is really what you want.The intentions behind separating can vary greatly from relationship to relationship and even between spouses.Couples may be trying to mend issues in their marriage and choose to do so separately but with the strong intention of reconciling.Any promises that do not materialize in the time committed.After a time apart, they realize that they want to make the relationship work and are highly motivated to make that happen.
And legal obligations can translate into emotional obstacles for getting into and staying in a new, healthy relationship.Fortunately, most divorced singles have as many pros as they do cons.He said he wanted me to meet his kids first and that he should never have asked me until that had happened.Or, if there are children involved, your spouse may decide to use the kids to hurt you by demanding and fighting for full custody simply because he or she is upset that there is another man in your life – and your children’s lives. Once your divorce is finalized and you're ready to start dating again, check out my book for some great first date ideas, Ideas For A Fun Date.He Was the One Who Wanted the Divorce -- Why Should He Care if I'm Dating? One of the biggest surprises in a divorce is that even though one person insists on getting divorced they may become furious if they see you getting on with your life -- let alone happily.